Sorting Famous Penn Staters in Hogwarts Houses
If you’re a Harry Potter fan, you’ve always wondered which house you would be placed in when you set foot at Hogwarts. The closest we Muggles can get is taking a quiz via Pottermore, the official site for all things Harry Potter.
But, it got us thinking – Where would some notable Penn Staters be placed if they had magic in their veins? We put on our Sorting Hat and chose the most likely destination for several Nittany Lions.
James Franklin – Slytherin
Let’s put that aside now: Slytherin does it not equal bad. This means that the people of Slytherin are cunning, daring, determined and intelligent. That’s a pretty accurate description of James Franklin.
Love him or hate him, he’s ready to make big shots to win a football game. Sometimes his calls are, shall we say, not surprising, but he is not conservative. Yet, he also calls out some parts which are actually very smart and work very well. This is the true trait of a Slytherin.
John Harrar – Gryffindor
John Harrar is the ideal Gryffindor. He is tough, fiercely loyal, courageous and friendly. He would go to war for all of his teammates, which would get them to support him. There’s a reason every coach Harrar has played under has called him the best leader they’ve ever coached.
Entering the transfer portal was a scary but courageous move for Harrar. He had to see what the options were. But because he loves Penn State so much, that loyalty eventually won out. No Penn State men’s basketball fan could say a bad word about Harrar. This, combined with his great leadership ability, makes him the perfect Gryffindor.
Preacher Willard – Gryffindor
It might not be what people have in mind when they think of preacher Willard, but we think the fit is there. He must be brave enough to stand in a State College tundra and speak his mind to thousands of students every day.
People tend to think that being a Gryffindor means you have to be a hero, but that’s not true. Showing bravery, even if it’s something you really shouldn’t be brave enough to do, is part of what makes them a Gryffindor. Preacher Willard fits that, although you might think what he says may align more with Slytherins.
Lara Spencer – Ravenclaw
This was the most difficult to sort out, in our opinion. Spencer has a lot of qualities that would work well for the Hufflepuffs, but we decided Ravenclaw was his best bet.
The fact that she comes from Donald P. Bellisario College of Communications, which is a top school for journalism majors, and features prominently on Good Morning America, has pushed her towards blue and black. She has become a staple in her field while embodying the traits of Ravenclaw wisdom and wit. A great presenter has both, and Spencer is just that.
Ty Burrell – Hufflepuff
How could one of America’s favorite TV dads not be a Hufflepuff? Burrell, the man behind Modern Family’s Phil Dunphy, is objectively a nice, likable guy. He radiates cuteness, from the character he plays on TV to the man in real life.
Burrell really seems like the fun daddy who would embarrass himself (and you) for a good laugh. But, he would also understand that everyone’s humor is different and go out of their way to make sure everyone feels comfortable with jokes. He appears to be a standing guy, and that’s what all Hufflepuffs try to be.
Micah Shrewsberry – Ravenclaw
Shrewsberry is an analytical thinker. Players have continuously praised him for having one of the best basketball IQs they have ever experienced. That makes him a perfect fit for Ravenclaw.
To be a Big Ten coach, you need to know the sport inside and out. Shrewsberry proved it with two stints at Purdue and a trip to the NBA under the guidance of former Celtics coach Brad Stevens. In short, the man knows the ball, and this knowledge will play a big role in the success of his team. Who knows – maybe a Ravenclaw as a head coach is just what it takes to put Penn State’s hoops on the edge.
Sue Paterno – Hufflepuff
Excuse our prejudices, but Sue Paterno may be the nicest woman in the world. Because of this fact alone, she automatically becomes a Hufflepuff. There is no one at State College who would dare to say a negative thing about Paterno.
She really cares about Penn State, and the Hufflepuffs are known to care what they love. She’s been a Happy Valley staple since everyone can remember her, and her kindness is what makes her such a legend. Every time she speaks, we all listen to her. She would be the most iconic Hufflepuff in Penn State history.
The Lion Nittany – Slytherin
It’s the boldest approach we’ve come up with, but we think it makes the most sense. The symbol of our best would give birth to Slytherin green at Hogwarts. His determination to make sure everyone has a fantastic time at Penn State events is unmatched, and it takes a daring person to surf in Beaver Stadium.
While he’s kind as a Hufflepuff and brave as a Gryffindor, he shows more Slytherin traits than either of those two. He would actually make a great addition to the home, even if Gryffindor’s pet is a real lion. Appearances can be deceptive, and while the Nittany Lion may look like a Gryffindor, he has the heart of a Slytherin.
Bill Donovan – Hufflepuff
Donovan is the good soul who greets everyone when they go to Blue Burrito and Slim Chickens in the HUB food court, making him the perfect Hufflepuff. If you didn’t like him, you’d probably be the kind of person to side with Voldemort.
So how well did we sort through these Penn Staters? Have we failed miserably? Have we hit the nail on the head? Let us know in the comments!